For one thing, good communication is important, and so is having great intimacy with your partner — which relies on both of you being emotionally open and honest with each other, and in particular, discharging any hostility or negative emotion you feel towards each other.
You are not going to get the most out of different sexual techniques unless the emotional foundation of your relationship's solid. Here's a place where you can get some information about that.
And another point — we strongly recommend that you view this website with your partner and discuss everything. That way, it'll be a bit like an ancient Japanese pillow book, the sexually arousing book given to newlywed couples to look at together, so they could get over their embarrassment before they got into bed. However, having said that, this website is primarily about sex positions, so let's have a look at some other aspects of most people's favorite group of sexual postures: In reality, there's a lot to be said for varying the way you connect physically with your partner when you're having sex.
In other words, use different approaches, different ways of making love, and different sexual techniques. So how are you going to do this? Well, one way is to drop the idea of vigorous thrusting and do something different. You can rub the head of your penis between the inner lips of your partner's vulva, and up onto her clitoris, using her natural lubrication to soften the motion. This is incredibly stimulating for both partners, and many women find it extremely erotic if the man ejaculates as a result of this exciting and sexy movement.
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Now here's the interesting thing: Of all the things which make men ejaculate slowly, delayed ejaculation is top of the list. If you have a problem with delayed ejaculation, click here to find out how to solve the problem.
And you can also ring the changes just by dipping the end of your penis into the outer part of your partner's vagina: Now, what about erection problems? They can certainly put a stop to sexual fun in the bedroom! Yet another variation which you can use to particular advantage in man on top sex positions is to alternate deep thrusts and shallow thrusts, for example by thrusting deeply five times and then much more shallowly five times: And finally you can do something different with your hips: It's an old Taoist trick which, I think I'm right in saying, is known as "churning the butter".
You can read about Taoist sexual techniques here, and if you have any physical problems such as gout you can read about how to deal with those too - click here for a gout diet.
Finally, on the subject of sexual intercourse and thrusting, please remember that slippery sex is good lovemaking, and not all women produce as much natural lubricant as might be comfortable. There are, however, a large number of what are known euphemistically as "personal lubricants" available. You'll enjoy sex more when you have the right lube, be it natural or artificial!
Delayed Ejaculation Furthermore, it is helpful to recall that some male sexual dysfunctions can be attributed to the issue of sexual position. The essence of that approach is that some positions produce high physiological arousal. So for the man, the partner's hands should lightly and timidly brush the mons pubis, the inner side of the thighs, the sexual organs and pass at once to the other side by a cautious and circuitous route, perhaps seeking out admittance to the anal area if desired.
Conversely, arousal is achieved by seeking the wife's vulva, so that her genital organs become accessible. The excitement caused by the previous caressing will probably have caused a certain degree of lubrication and increased blood supply. When this stage has been reached the man can touch the clitoris, which, already excited by the love play, though not hitherto directly touched, is congested and enlarged. The slightest touch yields marked excitement which intensifies desire to an incalculable degree.
This form of stimulation, together with words of love, kisses, and other love-play, may be extended to the whole genital area. But more often than not the titillation of the clitoris affords the woman the greatest excitement.
At the height of passion and emotion the man can insert his penis into the vagina and, with forward and backward thrusting, coitus replaces the preparatory love-play. We have seen how the tongue kiss can be employed to caress the partner's mouth or body. And it is often used as a means of genital stimulation, the advantage of this kiss is that it provides natural lubrication.
And this is most helpful in those cases where the genital lubrication is inadequate. Lack of adequate lubrication renders friction of clitoris and vagina painful, both during love-play and - still more - during actual coitus. Artificial preparations are often used in substitution for the natural lubricant when this is obviously delayed or insufficient.
The object, of course, is to avoid irritation or hurt, by making the parts smooth. Many of the preparations used for this purpose have proved far from satisfactory, and actually tend to promote the very irritation they are designed to prevent.
Some are not easily removed, even by fairly vigorous washing, and so may remain until they become rancid. Vaseline, which is often recommended for this purpose, does not become rancid, but it is not soluble in water, and is therefore not easily washed off.
Preparations which can be dissolved by the application of water are much to be preferred. Anything which serves to interrupt intercourse is to be avoided. This applies to many contraceptive techniques; it is important that their application should be done as unobtrusively and naturally as possible. That is why lubrication of the genital parts is best performed by means of a caress which is productive of pleasure to both parties. It cannot be too strongly stressed that any caress calculated to overcome fear in a hitherto inexperienced woman must be applied with the greatest gentleness.
The one thing to be avoided at all costs, when dealing with an inexperienced partner, is doing or saying anything which is likely to repel her in any shape or form. The man has to be exceedingly cautious in love-play.
He must guard against anything too adventurous too soon; especially where more intimate forms of love-play are involved. When dealing with a genuinely inexperienced woman, hasten slowly is a good rule to follow.
Variations of the Man on Top Sexual Techniques So what we're aiming to do here is to show you that your approach to lovemaking and coitus can be different. You might enjoy using the same old lovemaking position, but you don't have to carry on doing things the same way.
And there are good reasons why you shouldn't - the evidence suggests that couples who vary their sexual routine will stay together longer and enjoy better sex, and more powerful orgasms too, for that matter. So, for example, while you might think that a woman's pelvic movements are restricted during man on top sex, and that she can't actually thrust very much compared to, say, the way that perhaps she can during rear entry sex , that's only true up to a point.
When her man is not actually lying on top of her, as in some of the photographs below, she does have the opportunity to move reasonably freely. Please excuse the rather "stagey" photos; better ones are on the way. However, if you're the female partner, you might not even want to do that, because being purely receptive can be very fulfilling. And that's an approach to sex positions and sex techniques which is great, but you may want to try a different way from time to time.
Yes, regardless of what feminists may say, it can be very rewarding for a woman to give herself over completely to the idea of "being taken" by her man and embracing him fully as he does so.
I want to emphasize that while there may be many people out there who think this is prehistoric, caveman type of attitude to lovemaking, there's nothing wrong with actually expressing your most basic desires, wishes, and needs. So, if you're a woman who wants to be taken, who wants to be filled, who wants to be dominated, then for goodness' sake allow yourself to act it out once in awhile. And, if you're a man who wants to take a woman and dominate completely during sex, then act that out as well — with your partner's agreement.
Of course, in saying that, I'm assuming that all of this is done in a loving relationship between partners who understand each other. You can play with the darker edges of sex in various ways, within or without a relationship, but that's not really the subject of this website.
This is a place where you can get some information on that alternative approaches to sexual techniques f you're interested. If you're just looking for more conventional advice on relationships, then check out either of the following two sites. I don't like the title, because it implies a way of being with women which I don't like the sound of - however, I have to admit that he is a man who has got the art of seduction off to a "T".
The fact is, surprisingly enough, that the things which keep relationships together can also be the ones which bring a couple back together when they have split. And those very same things can add a lot of romance to a relationship.
The simplest variation is for the woman to move her legs back, and the man can kneel instead of laying down; these are both variations on sexual techniques give different sensations and different depths of penetration. Of course these things also alter the angle at which his penis enters her vagina, and this can be very significant in giving both partners extra pleasure. In fact, it's probably true to say that one of the big variations in every lovemaking position is the angle at which the man's erection enters his partner's body.
Some erections curve up, some curve down, and some are just straight ahead. Some men's erections point to the sky, and some point down the floor. Some erections are stiff, and others are more flexible. Unfortunately there's no way of advising an individual couple on how these differences can affect their sexual enjoyment — you really have to experiment to find out.
But what a beautiful thing to play with! Another variation comes from a woman's ability to squeeze her internal vaginal muscles while her man is inside her or while he thrusts — to give both herself and her partner great pleasure. And something else about using different techniques, or rather, variations of the same position: If she raises her legs and puts them on the man's shoulders as he kneels in front of her, then the message is a bit different: If the woman's hips are raised during man on top lovemaking, the sensations will be quite different, because it alters the angle of her vagina, and therefore puts different pressure on his penis and her internal G spot.
Such variations may make it possible for her to reach orgasm during sexual intercourse. One of the great things about man on top sex is the fact that it gives both partners the chance to look each other in the eyes during lovemaking. You don't have to spend all your time looking into each other's eyes while you're having sex, but it can certainly be great fun and very intimate to share a few minutes' gaze.
This is a powerful sexual technique. It's also quite interesting to see what happens during sex if you try and send a message to each other with your eyes. So if you're a man, try sending the following message without speaking, just communicating by the way that you look at your partner: You might be surprised what happens. Now, of all the lovemaking positions, man on top can convey your love for each other, with tender kisses from the man to the woman, either on her mouth or her breasts, or for that matter on any other part of her body within reach; there's so much skin to skin contact that man on top sex can truly provide the intimacy and sense of touch that we all desperately need in life but don't get often enough.
In short, the naked skin to skin contact and the intimacy of fucking in man on top sexual techniques can provide some of the most powerful expressions of sex in a relationship. As always with sex positions, care is needed to ensure you are having safe lovemaking - if you don't know your partner well, and you don't trust him or her, then ensure that what looks like a yeast infection isn't really some more serious sexually transmitted disease.
You need to protect yourself from the possibility that you may pick up or cross infect each other.