Taylor Carson November 7, at 2: After all, everyone is different and sex is a learning process! So, how can you reduce the amount of pain you feel? Lower your expectations Take some time and evaluate your own expectations. Be wary that popular culture often depicts intercourse as sensual and hot when, in reality, your first time is more likely to be sweaty and uncomfortable. You should never feel pressured by your partner, friends or society into having sex.
Find a peaceful space Everyone is anxious prior to having sex for the first time, so the last thing you need is for the process to be disrupted by outside noises. It is extremely important to feel comfortable physically, mentally and emotionally if you want to maximize pleasure. Talk about sex with your partner Often times, the pressure associated with sexual performance makes the experience more disappointing than it has to be.
To combat such pressures, take the time to have a sex talk with your partner beforehand. Make the conversation fun and relaxed. Start with openers like "I like when you do this What makes you both feel good? What are your boundaries? Knowing your partner is turned on will inadvertently turn you on more, too. Communicating beforehand will make you both feel more excited about the experience and, in turn, reduce pain.
Start with foreplay For sex to be enjoyable, you have to be turned on. Foreplay is a great and extremely fun way to get things started! It's important to note that foreplay is different for everyone. Take it slow To help ease into things, make sure you indicate to your partner that you want to take it slow. Your nerves and hesitancies might make it harder to be "turned on," and that can be painful!
If you're having trouble relaxing, try playing soothing music, focusing on your breathing, or simply laughing with your partner. Switch things up within your comfort zone, of course! Try again later Remember, collegiettes: The most important thing to do is laugh off the experience and learn from it. Trust us, when it comes to sex, practice makes perfect.