We at County Grind have a soft spot for the more sensual songs in life. We love those slow jamz that make you have to knock boots or whatever the kids are calling it these days. We're not kidding, not exaggerating; this is the real thing. So if you just had a heart attack or are experiencing a flare up, don't click ahead. You're entering the horny zone.
Keith Sweat, Featuring Athena Cage - "Nobody" Remember that college boyfriend who liked to play this one when he wanted to do the nasty? He knew you'd be thinking about only one thing once that CD started spinning. Don't make us spell it out for you. Toni's got the right idea. Braxton has one of these IRL, OkCupid, girl power parties, where muscle-men and nerds are up for grabs, we insist she invite us along. Her scraps are better than our prime meat. Wale, Featuring Tiara Thomas - "Bad" Talk about straight sex, this track features the sound of a squeaking mattress.
It's all about a chick so damaged she can't associate sex with love. This lady truly must possess the power take over the world, but only if she's as smart as she is raunchy. And that hook is addictive, Tiara Thomas' bedroom voice just makes you want to do something more fun than "Bad.
Sade - "By Your Side" This song represents a totally different side of boning. Play some Sade for the chick Wale was talking about, and guaranteed she'll be crying, hugging, and feeling mad romantic during her next nude encounter with a dude.
Kelly wants to wax it. He wants to pump it. He knows "there's something kinda sexy going on about you. It's that you remind him of his vehicle. Miguel - "Adorn" Miguel may be about as tall as your grandmother, but damn did he sing the most banging jam of the decade with "Adorn. This song will have you rubbing up on e'rybody at the club.
Just make sure to offer to buy them a drink either before or after, ya pervert. Chris Brown - "Poppin" Overlook the piece of poo that is Chris Brown's rep, and see for a sec that this guy is hot. Yeah, his style is way questionable like the video for "Fine China" in which he dates a Chinese chick , but the man can dance and deliver a hott two ts, yes ass song.
Ginuwine - "Pony" Ask your millennial boyfriend what this line from the bone anthem of the '90s means: Pretty sure he won't have any trouble getting the meaning of the rest of this song though. Beyonce - "Sweet Dreams" Beyonce is beautiful. She is a divine entity that roams this planet. But Beyonce isn't always really sexual. With "Sweet Dreams," she harnesses the horny part of her goddess, leaves behind the Earth Mother and brings the steamy temptress we knew was in there.
Turn the lights off, we say! When you make a song that talks about oral sex in terms of chow, you're on the sexy list. These Hotlanta boys brought out the sweetest and filthiest in food.
Eat it up, you fiends. Usher - "Nice and Slow" It's seven o'clock on the dot and Usher's got your panties round your ankles! Usher should have a sexy song shrine dedicated to him. He even made sadness sexy with last year's "Climax. Imagine a Sade, Usher duet.
It would permanently turn us all into crying vaginas. And damn is D'Angelo's song almost as hot as his former turn of the century physique. This is, on every level, a beautiful experience. This would make a straight woman or gay man that's dying a particularly painful death smile with pure pleasure. It fills us with love and warmth and other less wholesome things. Thank you, D'Angelo, forever, for this video and song. Kelly Rowland - "Motivation" Having a drought?
Let this be your motivation to get back on that horse. Kelly Rowland took all the sexy when Destiny's Child disbanded, and then she poured it into this ditty. Next - "Too Close" Sometimes sex is funny. And there's no song that makes sexin' more amusing than this one. It's about poppin' a boner while dancing. She can tell he's "excited" because of the "poke" coming through. He's trying to hide the chub, but he can't fight it, just like you can't fight the urge to dance too closely to this lewd classic.
Rihanna, featuring Mikky Ekko - "Stay" On the other end of the spectrum, "Stay" is a deeply sad song. It's got a nice emotional honesty to it that RiRi's jams tend to lack. But it's a damned downer. Play this one while weeping post-coitus with your ex. Kelly had to marry her before she was legal bad joke?
There's no good Aaliyah joke. Jodeci - "Feenin" Yeah, there might be sexier Jodeci songs, but this video is a real knee-slapper.
Also, any poon that gets you locked up in the crazy house is gonna make for an inspired tune. We don't want to hurt anymore! The tension is palpable, and the desire is oppressive. The sexy neighbor thing: This song will get you going any time, any place.
Jackson certainly knows her nasty. Make sure to follow Liz Tracy on Twitter for more sensual lists and bad jokes. If you like this story, consider signing up for our email newsletters.