His website contains many more exciting details, visit it at www. Resources — survivedthescourge jamesnimmo Does this article describe historical figures like Casanova, Bevenuto Cellini, or closer to our own era, politicians Bill Clinton and Newt Gingrich and entertainers with several divorces, just to touch the surface of people who we find out about due to scandal or other public revelation? Lack This is primarily drawn from the published literature, meaning it looks at people who could be clinically diagnosed with these symptom clusters disorders.
I preferred the risks associated with drugs rather than requiring to trust a woman i might not know at all. I ended up dating hookers, strippers and everyone else unavailable.. I just somehow unconsciously found a way to spot them, and I guess as narcissists they clung to my approval and fascination with their aloofness and detachment from emotional liability, while securing a partner who was sexually available but emotionally unavailable..
My last ex-GF was the most narcissistic psychopath I have ever encountered in the real or the criminal world. Our sex life was amazing to me, she wanted me to slap her and choke her and I have never been invited to do so. Of course, for her I was just a trophy indeed and at the very peak of my addiction to her, she went cold.
Three years later she told me she would take me back in a minute. Funny thing was she was a massage girl, and I checked every client.. That was her control. Some gusy might have thought they were her boyfriend, and they were the ones being fooled. Truly we are at opposite ends of the spectrum. She was able to run through men like nothing… not me.. With my ex and other narcs.. So regardless of how wonderful, gorgeous or intelligent one may be to the entire universe..
I consider them like trophy hunters and we are the moose or deer.. They may talk about the day they caught the BIG one.. And no, they do not throw back the babies. A borderline is like a trophy hunter who approaches the animal unsure, walks up and pets it, feeds it some food and even tells it how sorry it is they were there to hunt it. The problem begins when the animal begins to walk away… Ed Quote: What planet are you living on where borderlines only start cheating and lying and abusing their partners when their partner wants to leave them?
You do realise that all those terrible things you described your Ex girlfriend doing can be found in abundance in borderline women right? But even if that were actually true it would still be absolutely delusional or incredibly ignorant if you think that those with borderline personality are the way you described. If I were to make your analogy more accurate. It would be like befriending an an animal and initially treating it very well. Then after a while you get bored of it but still keep it around, but you start to hate and resent it.
You start to hurt it and get angry with it, but you flip back and forth to keep it confused and unsure what to think. Over time you increase the abuse which it learns to accept as normal and so desperate for that love it saw at the beginning that they look forward to the smallest displays of affection.
How are yu coping with this now that you know would love to talk to you Pingback: Cerebral narcissist, covert narcissist, malignant narcissist, invert narcissist. If you listen to endless numbers of people describing narcissist and borderlines and not be able to tell the behaviours apart, then the reason for the distinction becomes arbitrary.
BPD should be, and is, just another form of narcissism. Where BPD should be seen as a sub category where not all narcissists are borderlines, but where all borderlines are narcissists.
I have to correct something in this article. The classic narcissist still hates themselves, just as the borderline does. The borderline has a similar cognitive dissonance. This is instead usually expressed as a more conscious feeling of worthlessness. They require validation to show they are worth something and make that empty feeling go away. Just like the classic narcissist, the borderline also only cares about attaining their supply of validation. And if people are still going to disagree with this, the fact that you find a consistent pattern with all stories of npd and bpd behaviour that prove this to be true disagree with you.
But I bet the truth is more likely one of two things. I do not believe they are a disorder so much as a naturally reoccurring and intended personality type — we are humans — but still quite animal. Yet still the most glaring aspect — most animals, especially humans, need structure…. I have to say the world would be much much less interesting without these people…and quite honestly much less of a world considering the accomplishments of those who do not allow others limits to impede them.
As a woman I am fascinated by the rigid arrogant way a surgeon carefully performs massive alterations to other people in a believe they can save their life or improve upon their beauty….. A personality disorder hence the word disorder requires impairments in various areas of life. The asshole narcissistic surgeon is not NPD unless, for example, he suddenly decides he will do brain surgery for a patient despite not being qualified to do that.
Or status showing up to work drunk. BB Jones I absolutly agree…there seems to be a belief that if you dont have the same values and capabilities as someone who has a psychology degree then you have a disorder…that needs to be treated.
I also have a partner with Borderline Personality Disorder amd Anorexia who had become hooked on Meth for many years…my view of her was pretty much as per the book with periods of mania and the drugs and Anorexia was her mechanism to remove the lows and anxiety. She is very smart and plays the therapists she has seen like puppets to get what she wants…the drs have always tried various medications that have failed because they see the mania as a problem…the dont seem to see the obvious issue with treating it, in that its like she has been watching 4k TV with surround sound and dining out at the finest restaurants and they are trying to get her to listen to an AM radio with a peanut butter sandwich.
She has developed a trust with me because I dont see these things as a disorder but a beautiful tallent. When she starts to see the world in an anxious state of mind…we have a cuddle, I tell her how amazing she is, stroke her and calm het down…we then have sex…mind blowing lying there with your head spinning, oh wow, what just happened sort of sex and then cuddle and feel like we are both lucky…anxiety: The more submissive she is…the happier she is, im no sadist dominant guy etc.
I am at the top of my profession, a company director, highly innovative etc. And am considered to have a very high IQ and EQ…. I have children who ars well balanced and high performing in school…confident with great empathy …so yea its a terrible disorder I am suffering from!
I also meant to say that DBT looks like it has some positives…but its just a good start! I do not believe NPD and BPD are bad people they like everyone else have good and bad and thats life if you choose to see it that way. But i believe the article is talking about how people with such disorders treat themselves and others they come into contact with. I do not believe such people are the ones that make life interesting and to believe such is what interests life is a measure of how indifferent and less caring the world has fallen.
My business, my children, all friendships, and almost my sanity and life. Or was… I was raised tough by strick military parents on a base in Germany for 15 years. Beaten into my being from birth were the American Christian values of God, Country, morals, values, honor and respect… The essence of right versus wrong are ingrained in my process and procedurally focused mind.
Events in life are right or wrong, there is no grey! My issue was believing I could help, fix or love another person enough to guide them toward happiness.
What I learned from this experience, will never be forgotten. And cannot ever be repeated! Do I love her? I will not forgive her nor allow her in my life. I allowed the abuse, cheating, manipulation, triangulation for too long. Believing the lies because I am codependent, and empathic… or rather tough on the outside and soft on the inside..
My lack of self respect, self esteem and boundaries allowed her the freedom to terrorize my life. So believe me when I can now with absolute certainly.. How I was able to heal and move on. Research, research, research… Finding myself, forgiving myself, rebuilding my life. Not allowing myself to doubt, be critical of or self punish anymore.
I am alive and free… free to be happy and love each day without fear again. I am not an expert or carry any credentials to mention. If I could say one thing that helped me. Can I trust him again? He was recently diagnosed and seeing a therapist! Problem is will He repeat these behaviors …. Can I trust that? Honestly, in my case, the best thing fo me was leaving, getting help, blocking her from my life and finding myself again. Many wonderful folks from discussion groups, therapy and good friends and even strangers have said it is time.
I hated hearing it myself because I wanted a majic fix, an insiders answer.. They need that more than anything. I have sole custody of 3 sons from a prior marriage. I was only ever thinking about myself. So consumed with her I neglected to consider my boys were sharing in the misery and living the same hell. We are all in therapy, individually and as a family. This has been a remarkable year for us. And I think we are going to be ok.
I learned how to listen better, and be a better communicator and I pray a better dad too. And I should have done that from day one! Abusers I think can change if they really wanted too.