This is a very honest and personal post, holding nothing back. This is a post to get conversations started and to get honesty and body acceptance out there — as well as to serve as explanations in how body size relates to sex toy use. Another point I want to be clear on: So before we begin, a little visual aide is needed for some of you.
All photos grabbed from Google Image, and copyright is unknown. Examples of thinner people with easily exposed clits: And the same is true for overweight people. Some may gain in their ass and thighs with a relatively flat stomach and thin face. Some may grow giant boobs and have a curvy bubble butt. Some may look pregnant. I mostly blame porn for the seeming misconception that when legs are spread, the clitoris is visible and easily accessible.
A situation where a flat, broad vibrator would work just fine. For me, in order to get to my clit, I must spread my outer labia I have no inner labia to speak of to varying degrees. This is not unique to weight or body size. For a vibrator that is not slender, I would have to spread my labia pretty wide to get good clitoral contact. Vibrators that are easily dampened when surrounded by flesh also require this spreading.
Is it that big of a deal to just spread em? After awhile, it starts to hurt. Also, that means that clitoral vibration is a two-handed job. Forget using that other hand for anything else. The wearable vibrating panty sort of things would also never work on me, as they are flat and lay outside the labia.
When they added the remote to the We-Vibe 3, it took away my major issues with it. Back in the day when I would use my corded silver bullet vibe in situations where I was clothed, my labia would completely hug and nearly cover the egg shaped vibrators. They would hold it in perfect position until I became too aroused and wet. Other things that mystify me: Just never will happen for me. This currently means that anything I use for internal stimulation needs to be longer. Internal vibrators, and dildos, that stick straight out of the vagina are sticking straight out the wrong damn way for me.
I have put on more weight now than 7 years ago, when I could use a traditional rabbit vibrator with only minor reachability issues. When it comes to sex toys like the Split Dildo or the G-Vibe by Fun Toys, having something that requires me to be squeezing the tips together during insertion is just an all around disaster.
All of my weight seems to settle in the middle, front or back, much to my dismay. Traditional porn is fine, but it needs to come with an anti-reality warning. I really feel like sex toy makers are using the size body model for figuring out if their sex toy is going to work in theory. One sex toy that I thought could work great for me, due to the shape and length, was the J-Pop dildo by G-Spot Lollipop.
As utterly ridiculous as I found their whole concept, the fact that the handle came back up towards the pubic mound felt like a positive aspect. Until Epiphora mentioned that the J curve really was a J curve, and not a more open lazy-C curve like the Pure Wand, and that even on her of average body size and no fat belly to speak of the handle was uncomfortably close to her mound and belly.
It seems like the J-Pop was only tested, if at all, on a very thin person. Are You Just Whining? I have many reasons for writing this. Another reason is to see what others like me experience. How our experiences are the same, and how they are different. Talk about it on your own blog, comment here, hell even comment here anonymously — just get it out.
I want, someday, for the more conscientious sex toy makers to keep this in mind. To know that with certain designs, they are alienating an entire sector of their audience.
Could there, someday, even be an entire line of sex toys for the plus size person? Toys made for all of these issues in mind? I want to hear from all genders, too, on all types of sex toys and the issues you have with them. Tell us about specific toys that were bad or specific ones that were great. My reviews, my opinions, are NOT strictly from the viewpoint of a larger person. Just like there are other people out there the same size as me, there are lots of people with similar g-spot needs as me, similar clitoral needs, similar vulva shape.